Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, I opted for a virtual option for the Leadership-in-action (LiA) in Fiji. Although I could not travel to Fiji in person to meet Fijians and laidlaw scholars coming from other universities, I did not miss out a lot of experiences. Thanks to the nicest instructors from Think Pacific, Naomi and Levania, I learnt a lot about the background and culture of Fiji.

Throughout the 6 weeks, I was involved in a project to create a self-care tool kit for carers of patients with mental illnesses. The tool kit will be used by the Psychiatric Survivors Association (PSA), a Fiji-based non-governmental organization. I worked with Laidlaw scholars from HKU, the staff from PSA, as well as the instructors. To enable us to create something that would be impactful to Fijian, Think Pacific offered various activities, ranging from talks by guest speakers to culture sessions, from skills sessions to weekly reflections. From the culture sessions, I got exposed to different aspects of Fiji eg. food and rituals. On one hand, I was amazed by how distinctive Fijian’s culture was like eg. welcoming celebration ‘Sevusevu’ and traditional craft ‘weaving’. On the other hand, I was more amazed by how different cultures share similarities with each other. For example, both Chinese and Fijian had strong emphasis on family and importance of belongingness.

I found the skill workshops to be particularly useful to practice leadership. It is always easier said than done to be a good leader. As our group was composed of scholars with different backgrounds, it was very difficult at first to work together. I still recalled how difficult it was to find a time that all of us could be present to discuss the presentation. Due to the lack of instant communication, a lot of misconceptions were caused. I got very frustrated during the process since I had really put in a lot of effort, but still could not meet up to the team’s expectation. But luckily, I was given a skills session on positive mindset and resilience on the following week. I understood that I should not take things personally, but should rather seek help when necessary. Thus, I communicated with one of the groupmates, and she was so nice to offer me some help and encouragement. This experience had highlighted the importance of seeking help. To be a leader, you do not have to be bulletproof. Having a positive mindset does not mean you always have to be smiling when facing adversity. What is more important is to learn from the incident and grow out of the negative thinking with some actions. This is a skill that will be engraved in my mind and contributed to the success in my future career.

Another skill workshop that I found highly impactful was on giving and receiving feedback. I am always very nervous when giving feedback to others. In my perspective, feedback tends to be negative and I am afraid of criticizing others since I am also afraid of being criticized. But this skill workshop has changed my perspective on feedbacks. The instructors introduced ‘the sandwich method of criticism’. Actually, feedback could be both positive and negative. It is easier to be accepted when negative feedback is being wrapped with praises. Also, the instructors also highlighted other essential factors on giving feedbacks eg. emotional states of the person, timing in a day. As mentioned above, the dynamic in my group was not so great due to a lack of instant communication. And I also observed that the feedback given by our group members tended to be negative. To raise the momentum in my group, I tried this sandwich method of criticism. I was not sure if it was useful, but I felt more relieved when giving feedbacks to my fellow groupmates. I reckoned that the skills of giving and receiving feedbacks are essential, especially when we will be working with people from different backgrounds. By considering different essential factors, I hope that I could be a leader who is able to give feedback in a way that the receiver does not feel bad or lose their confidence in work.

Throughout the 6 weeks experience, I had many take-aways. But in terms of further experiences to prepare myself for my future career, I will obviously say the importance of opening up. Since young, I had always been an introvert and always felt uncomfortable to share my opinions in front of people. Yet, from these 6 weeks, I realized that there is no absolute right and wrong, but just a different in perspective. I would like to thank the instructors for being very encouraging and welcoming when I tried to speak up. I have always refused to take up the role of being a leader as I am never the smartest student in class. Yet, from their encouragements, I feel like I am actually capable of being a leader (if I am willing to). It is a difficult step for me since I always feel very insecure of myself. However, I will try to seek for more leadership experiences, both inside HKU and outside HKU. By working with more people of different backgrounds, I will be equipped with the essential skills to work with different professionals that I may meet in the future. 

In retrospect of the reasons for undertaking the Laidlaw program, I actually was only interested in doing research under a renowned professor out of curiosity. It had also taken me ages to pluck up the courage and to apply for the program, thinking that I will never be selected. However, the whole program had given me much more than I ever expected. In terms of the research experience, I was given great autonomy to conduct research with my partner. Not only was I given the chance to conduct the research (eg. creating questionnaire), I was also given chance to do preparation work (eg. ethics applications, participants recruitments). I was more than delighted to have a glance of how the whole research process was like. This had lightened up my interest in research and led me to consider a career in the academia in the future. In terms of leadership training, I recognized a lot of false believes of leaders in myself eg. leaders have to be the smartest, bulletproof and cynical. I was enlightened that there could be many different leadership types and no one type is more superior than the other. In terms of networking, I got to meet many bright students from HKU and other schools in the Laidlaw network. From viewing their posts in the Laidlaw network, I got insight into different thinking style and connected with a number of like-minded individuals.

I am confident to say that this Laidlaw program acts like a turning point for myself. As mentioned above, I have always been an introvert who is very insecure of myself. But this program has given me chances to know more about myself and see the potential in myself. I have never imagined that I could do research with the help of my supervisors and my partner. I also have never imagined that me and my groupmates could come up with a self-care tool kit that will be used by PSA later this year. All of these achievements would never have happened if I did not pluck up the courage and apply for Laidlaw program in first place.  

All in all, I am truly thankful for the research and leadership opportunity given by Laidlaw. Without the generous support from Laidlaw and HKU, I could never have known myself better. I will be more than happy to ‘give back’ to the program in the future whenever possible.